Traveling the Rock Road

This is going to be short today so bear with me.

As a child it seemed that disappointment and failure were attributes that would follow me all the days of my life. I didn’t learn to read like most kids and learning was difficult. One psychologist at a well-known hospital told my mother I would never rise above a 6^th grade level in my intelligence and personality. I couldn’t swim or ride a bike no matter how much I tried or who was trying to help me. When I tried my hand at learning to play guitar, the instructor, after several lessons, said it was a waste of his time and my mom’s money to keep trying; I just didn’t have it. Throw in a great uncle, my main male role model, who constantly reminded me of my short comings and, well, you can see how any child would have low self-esteem with early building blocks such as these. For a period of time, I was resolved that this would be my course in life, nothing to build on, and nothing to offer anyone else; just another statistic of a fatherless boy with no direction. But ya know, I’ve learned for every hopeless person as I and others saw me, there’s generally someone who doesn’t buy into the stereotype tag placed on that individual. For me that would have been my mom and Great Aunt Pearl.

Like any mother, Ma was always in my corner telling me I was better than people said; that I could and would rise above all the problems. And I appreciate all her loving support, but it was actually something Pearl once said that perhaps got the ball rolling in right direction. “Johnny, I believe in you, your mother does, and I know God has something better in store for you. But that means nothing until one thing happens; you have to believe in yourself the most.”

“You weren’t an accident. You weren’t mass produced. You aren’t an assembly-line product. You were deliberately planned, specifically gifted, and lovingly positioned on the earth by the Master Craftsman.” Max Lucado

It took years for me to see my beginning did not have to determine the end product; God has a special purpose for me with talents He provides to make me into the person He wants me to be.

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

I could go into a lot more detail, but I said I want to keep this short.  It wasn’t until the words of my Pearly Mae came home to roost that a difference started to emerge. I had to believe in myself, not in an arrogant way, but in the belief that God had something more for this “Traveler of the Rock Road” than what others claimed. God put it there; it was up to me to decide if I would go after it.

Over the years I conquered the skill of reading and many of those other short comings. I am a college graduate with honors, I have competed in numerous triathlons, while at the same time biking thousands of miles every year, and ones that know me will attest to the fact that I can hold my own on a couple of musical instruments. Again! This is not to blow my own horn; I’m still not the sharpest knife in the drawer and if you take all my accomplishments and $5 to Micky D’s, you can get yourself a happy meal! I’m saying if this is what God can do for me, imagine what He can do for you. Amen?

I write this today with one person in mind that is struggling to believe in himself and what God can do through him; I know he’ll be reading this and I hope he takes my words to heart. I believe that’s why God made me a writer; if I can get just one person to buy into what I’m saying, then it’s worth every dotted I and crossed T.

Let me close with two of my favorite sayings that summarize the point.

“If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning… Face it, friend. He is crazy about you!”

“God loves you just the way you are, but He refuses to leave you that way. He wants you to be just like Jesus.”

The rest, Friends and Family, is up to you.

See ya next time.

Jim and I had one thing in common, we both were trying to make it as musicians with the big boys; from that point on it went downhill. He was older, more confident and truthfully much better at his instrument than I was. Throw in he didn’t like me from the moment we met and, well, let’s just say that’s not the makings of a lasting friendship.

We found ourselves together in a band for an up and coming singer and we both thought we finally grabbed the gold ring. But constantly Jim ridiculed and criticized my playing in front of everyone else knowing I would sit there and take it. Thankfully the singer liked me and would tell Jim to knock it off. After a performance, the guys in the band would go out while I’d stay in a motel room watching TV since I wasn’t old enough to go the places they went, and of course my buddy Jim would drive a dagger into me with statements bashing my age.

One late evening, bored with television, I opened a dresser drawer and found a Gideon’s Bible and started leafing through pages. Wouldn’t you know that would be about the time everyone got back, loose from a lot of drinking. Soon as Jim saw me an evil smile came over his face. “Look guys, Johnny’s going to preach us a sermon; go ahead Johnny, lay it on us!” I just kept looking down at the Bible, not really reading, but doing my best not to lose my temper. He came over and sat on the bed next to me and started, “So tell me, are you going to heaven someday?” “Well, yes, I’d like to think so.” “How do you know you’re going to get to heaven, or if there really is a heaven?” he shot back. Jim enjoyed the moment of quiet knowing he had me in a tight spot. I believed in God but really didn’t know enough to answer him the way I should, so I started; I was raised to believe in God, Jesus, heaven and the Bible, and if I did my best to do what God wants me to then someday I would get to heaven.” Now the quietness came from Jim as he glared at me through glassy and somewhat angry eyes. Then in a quieter but still forceful voice he said, “Let me tell you what I believe, I don’t know if there’s a heaven or hell but I do know heaven never sounded like a place that would have someone like me in it. If there’s a hell then that’s where I’m going and that’s that. So I may as well enjoy life any way I want until then.” My mind couldn’t come up with anything to say that was contrary to Jim’s reasoning, so after a few moments of staring at each other he stumbled off to his bed and went fast asleep. The room went dark and the rest followed Jim’s lead leaving me virtually alone again. As I laid wide awake my only thought was Jim’s words, “If there’s a hell then that’s where I’m going and that’s that.” I don’t know if my anger burned more at his attitude, or my inability to give him a solid answer. Perhaps what fueled the rage in me is the small voice in my mind that was saying, “He’s right you know.”

It was years later I finally understood what one writer meant when he said, “Only Jesus could build a bridge to Heaven with just two pieces of wood.”

Even though I saw myself as “better” than Jim, I believed the same way he did; if the good you did outweighs the bad you would get to Heaven. For me that meant trying hard to do good, for Jim it was an impossibility that couldn’t be reached so why try. As I began to understand the words in that Gideon Bible, I came to the realization Jim was right; there’s no way I could be good enough to get into Heaven.

First, can I be good enough?

Isaiah 64:6 “All of us have become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous acts are like filthy rags; we all shrivel up like a leaf, and like the wind our sins sweep us away.”

Romans 3:10 As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one.”

So does God love me or not?

Isaiah 41:10 “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Romans 8:38-39 “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

1 John 4:16 “So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.”

Then how do we get to Heaven?

Romans 6:23 “For the wages of sin is death, but the “GIFT” of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 10:9-10 “If you declare with your mouth, Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved.”

John 3:16 John 3:16-17 “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God “DID NOT” send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.”

It’s not about good deeds outweighing bad and hoping you did enough to tip the scales in your favor;  its God in His love for “ALL” of us pure and simple.

Ephesians 2:8-9 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith, and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God, not by works, so that no one can boast.”

I left the band shortly after that night and never saw that cotton pickin’ trouble making “Traveler of the Rock Road” Jim again. I heard he moved out to L.A. to try and break into the music industry there. Looking back as much as a thorn in my side he was I wish I knew then what I know now so I could say, “As much as you think you’re the worst apple in the cart, God still loves you just the way you are, ya pompous pigheaded bone brain!” In Jesus name, of course. 😉

But I have no doubt God has made Himself known to old Jim somewhere down the line through other people and avenues. Who knows, perhaps with a Gideon Bible in some cheap motel. I just know God’s pretty good at letting His love be known to ones like Jim, me, even you.

After all, you’re reading this, aren’t ya?

See ya next time.

To this day, some 50 years later, it still makes no sense why this guy targeted me. I suppose the main reasons were that I was smaller than he was, he was a bully and I’m guessing he wanted to impress the girl in the car with him by thumping a kid smaller and younger than he. All I know is my friend and I were walking down the street when the car with four teenagers, probably around 18 years old, passed and shouted some derogatory words at us. My buddy and I stared but didn’t say anything until they stopped the car. This tall lanky, rather dirty sandy haired blond jumped out and started walking back our way. Coming face to face he accused me of giving him the middle finger salute, to which I hadn’t but he was bent on the fact of kicking the stuffing out of me. Now all my life it never made sense to me why anyone would want to fight just for the sake of proving how tough they are, particularly some grease ball four years older and a head taller than me! Life had not been easy for me in my young days, got picked on a lot for various reasons, but the main one was because I wouldn’t fight. Unfortunately that’s exactly what bully types look for, an easy prey on whom they can inflict harm without receiving any payback.

This meat-eater wasn’t about to walk away until he put another notch in his slingshot, thus came the haymaker he laid on my head. For whatever reason, for the first time in my life, I started swinging for all I had, mostly out of fear to tell the truth. Then something happened for the very first time, this guy let out a big grown from a punch I landed to his ribcage. He stopped and started breathing very hard; I felt the same way but sure wasn’t going to let him know. After a moment of composing himself he came at me again shouting, “Don’t use your feet!” I was kicking? With the adrenalin rush that was pumping through my body I didn’t know what I was doing; and when did it become part of the rules for an aggressor to tell you what you can and cannot do in a street fight?!! When round two began I went at him with more confidence than I ever had before. It didn’t help me not get hit any less, with his size the punch ratio was probably 3/1 in his favor. Yet I was determined I wasn’t going to give in unless he hurt me so bad I couldn’t fight anymore. For just a moment I was mesmerized by what happened next. Breathing harder still he turned and walked quickly back to the car shouting over his shoulder, “Don’t you ever let me catch you again.” My friend and I stood there watching them drive off then looked at each other and his words summed up how I felt. “Man, your face looks like it went through a meat grinder!” I felt what he was seeing, but it didn’t matter, I had never felt so good in my life! For the first time ever, I took a stand.

C.S. Lewis: “God knows our situation; He will not judge us as if we had no difficulties to overcome. What matters is the sincerity and perseverance of our will to overcome them.”

Often, I have thought of the early believers and followers of Jesus Christ; many when the hard times came folded and ran away. But others stood by the Lord and refused to budge from their faith in Him. His disciples could have run also, instead they stood firm where most were put to death. They would not waver in their convictions that Jesus was the Son of God.

James 5:11 “Behold, we consider those blessed who remained steadfast. You have heard of the steadfastness of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful.”

To this day I still see fighting for no reason (self-defense excluded) worthless and only something that the weak use to prey on the weaker. As for my faith, well I may never be a Peter or a Paul, but I will stand my ground on the conviction that Jesus is Lord.

Romans 5:3-4 “More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope”

As for the grease ball, we met for Round 3 about half an hour later in the parking lot of a fast food restaurant where we both were more determined than previously. And like before, he pummeled me more than I did him, that is until he stumbled, fell down and I jumped on him swinging until he gave up. Many people were out there watching, particularly one guy who had bullied me in the past. The aggressor quickly got back in the car and left. Then I hear the voice of this other guy.

“Hey Miller, good fight, way to stand your ground.” I felt half dead, beaten worse than I had ever been in my life, but hearing those words pumped energy and pride through every part of my body.

There’s a day coming, after my journey of “Traveling the Rock Road” that I hope to hear words similar to those again. This time it won’t be from an an old bully, it’ll be from the One who has loved always.

“Well done, good and faithful servant.”

See ya next time.

I suppose you could blame it on the many years I spent in my chosen field as an industrial technician and analyst. Early on I was taught to never be content with the first answer you get in analyzing material or a test specimen. Can you get the same answer when repeating your test process twice and even three times? Are there other methods you can use to examine your sample and do answers match up with what you use for your normal process? At times, a testing procedure can devour hours, even days until you finalize the results and come to a conclusive answer. Generally speaking the final answer is one that is expected, but unfortunately there are moments that do not produce what had been hoped for or expected. It can also prove to be fruitless in understanding the given results; at those moments, we use a term I’m sure is used broadly in the analyzing world and other scenarios: “It is what it is.” So with this type of influence and background it’s little wonder why I approach many subjects the same way.

Over the course of my adult life I have pursued many interests: people, music, history, family tree, businesses, technology, machines and even vehicles. In every case I research as many avenues on a subject that I can find, trying to exhaust every bit of info each has to offer. If several sources agree and give the same answers, you can be rather sure of the findings. However, if a subject matter results in differing conclusions (say tracing a historic person or event) and in some cases theory takes place of solid facts, “It is what it is.”

As far back as I can remember I’ve always had a belief in God, that He’s out there somewhere watching over me and that the Bible was His Word; I may not have understood everything about Him or what’s in the Bible, but I believed it to be true. Then came a moment in my life that I call my “Dark Period.”  During this time, several occurrences entered my life; an accident that nearly took the lives of me and my family, another where a dear loved one was killed, failed business, financial ruin, and accusations aimed at me for suspected wrong doing. Each time I prayed to God for help, only to suffer another setback. I admit I began to question if the Lord really cared what happened to me, and frankly if He was even there or if the Bible could be trusted as truth or mere historical writings that seemed to contradict each other. Reading the Word became mundane as did attending church so I chose to isolate myself; if I couldn’t find comfort than I would just as soon be alone. But the more I closed up the more, it seemed, God was talking to my heart. There’s much wisdom in Max Lucado’s words, “God loves you just the way you are, but He refuses to leave you that way. He wants you to be just like Jesus.”

“Okay God, if you’re really there and Jesus, you really came to earth and Holy Spirit, you’re actually there to help and guide me, let’s just see if the proof is in the pudding!”  I began a two-year quest to put my hands on and study every piece of material on who God is and what the Bible really says. I studied men and women who dedicated their lives to serving a Being they had never seen and still gave that Being praise and glory no matter what became of them. I studied a score of authors and books on apologetics, the study and defense of God and the Bible. I read scriptures from numerous versions, English, German, Greek, Hebrew, Aramaic to see how they matched up against each other. But mostly, I dug into the Bible to get understanding of what it was saying and I prayed as one brother who was facing more trouble and heartache than he could handle saying, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!”

At the end of my sojourn, “Traveling the Rock Road,” to a better understanding of the one I call Lord, my heart and mind (besides at times having a headache that could kill a bull elephant) were at peace, knowing my God was there and His love, no matter what came, was beyond measure. Now I could give you quotes and scriptures to back my study that would easily fill ten more pages if not more.  But after all is said and done one of my favorites comes from Paul writing to Timothy. “That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet this is no cause for shame, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day.”

As for quotes, well I like how old Billy Graham put it: “God has a plan for the life of every Christian. Every circumstance, every turn of destiny, is for your good. It is working together for completeness. His plan for you is being perfected. All things working together for your good and for His glory.”

So did I find an answer to every question that I had? Well in one word, nope! If I am to be honest with all you wonderful people there were a few questions, they were a few minute, or as we say in metallurgy, “trace elements” that I never could come to fully understanding. So where do we go from there? Getting back to what we used to say in the lab, “It is what it is.” In talking to one dear old saint, who has since gone to be with the Lord, about the unanswerable question, he softly smiled at me and said; “Oh the wonderful mysterious ways of our Lord that won’t be revealed until heaven!” In other words, he summed up “It is what it is” with just one word and belief–Faith.

“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.”

In closing today let me sum up what all my studies, all the labor and hours dedicated to understanding the God of the universe taught me most. And I can do that with the words of an old, old song written by Anna Bartlett Warner that perhaps you might have heard sometime or other.

Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so;

Little ones to Him belong, they are weak, but He is strong.

Yes, Jesus loves me! Yes, Jesus loves me! Yes, Jesus loves me!

The Bible tells me so.

See ya next time.

By no doing of my own I have been the owner of two burial plots down in my birth home of Princeton West Virginia. They’re set high on a hill overlooking beautiful mountains off in the distance. I’ve sat up there often taking in the view, feeling the presence of God in nature, while visiting the resting place of my beloved Aunt Pearl; which leads to how I came to own the two sites next to her.

Back during a visit in the 60s Pearly Mae visited this cemetery and realized this was the place she wanted her and her husband Price to be laid to rest. Always thinking of others, in this case my mom and me, she bought four sites with the idea we would all have a place when our time here on earth ended. In later years she would chuckle as she exclaimed, “I never gave a thought that when you’d grow and marry and want to be buried with your wife.” Good old Pearl.

Then in 1984 my caring and giving Great Aunt passed away from injuries sustained in an accident. Mom became the beneficiary to Pearl’s entire estate, including the remaining burial plots. Over the 20 years the question of what to do with them came up often. Neither of us had any plans of being buried there since our home was now Indiana, so selling them seemed to be the most pliable option. Then Ma would say, “Well, let’s not do anything right now; I want to think on it for a while;” And the matter would continue to go unresolved. Ma went home to be with Lord in 2008, leaving me as her only child to inherit all that she owned; and by then the burial sites in West Virginia was something I gave no thought to.

In wasn’t until a visit there two years ago to see family that I remembered this bit of unfinished business. Driving over to the cemetery I went to the office to inquire about the plots and was told it would take at least half an hour to pull up the records. That was fine since it gave me time to walk up and visit Pearl’s grave. Sitting there next to her marker, looking out at the Fall colors that lit up the trees on the mountains my memory went back to my childhood. Bacon, eggs, biscuit and gravy breakfasts, chores to do with Pearl in the garden, playing the card game rummy after dinner. But mostly remembering that dear woman’s smile and her ways. Then I thought about the place I was sitting was most likely where she had planned for me to be buried. I quickly jumped to my feet! Returning to the business at the bottom of the hill, and as I walked along I prayed, “God I hope you can help me do Pearl right on this whole thing, because I sure don’t know what to do; I need help!”

By the time I returned to the office they all the paperwork completed including a quick claim for me to sign. Then the lady behind the desk asked me, “So do you plan to be buried here?” “No Ma’am, and I’m not really sure what to do with them.” “Well you could transfer them to another cemetery within 75 miles, or you can sell them but that’s something you’d have to take care of yourself.” Since my Lady and I plan to have our ashes spread at Linville Falls, NC and I had no desire to try and sell, I found neither option was workable. I then asked her, “Could I contribute them to someone that was in need, and do you know of anyone?” This dear soul now was staring at me as in disbelief, which I took to mean no one had ever asked that before. Then quietly she stated, “I have a situation that came to me this morning of an elderly couple where the husband passed away and they don’t have burial plots or the funds to buy any. After a short staring contest, we both smiled when I said “I believe we have some more paperwork to do.”

2 Corinthians 9:8-11, “And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work. As it is written, He has distributed freely, he has given to the poor; his righteousness endures forever. He who supplies seed to the sower and bread for food will supply and multiply your seed for sowing and increase the harvest of your righteousness.  You will be enriched in every way to be generous in every way, which through us will produce thanksgiving to God.”

One moral Pearl placed in me was if God has given you enough to meet your needs, He’s also given you the opportunity to help others less fortunate; perhaps something that doesn’t mean that much to you may mean the world to someone else. As I stood there signing the new papers the thought came to me; “How bout that Pearly Mae, years after you’ve gone to heaven you’re still giving to make others happy.” I couldn’t even imagine the little smile she’d get at times like this. Awesome!

I doubt if I’ll ever know these “Travelers of the Rock Road” that God ordained to receive this  gift at just the right moment.  And that’s probably best anyway.  After all, it really didn’t come from me; I was just the delivery boy. God set this in motion some 50 years prior when He put it on Aunt Pearl’s heart to buy extra plots that would never be used as she thought.

What are those words from an old TV show? Oh yeah; “I love it when a plan comes together!!”

See ya next time.

I’ve spoken often of my relationship to my Great Aunt Pearl and how much I loved her but I don’t believe I’ve ever told about her and my mom’s connection. When Ma was still a teenager her mother passed away from cancer leaving her and two brothers to the care of the father. Carl, the oldest had enlisted in the Marines and was already living with Pearl until he left for boot camp, Ma and her younger brother Clyde both suffered physical problems and my grandfather felt it was more than he could deal with alone. So two of my grandmother’s sisters stepped up to take and raise the children; Clyde who had polio went to live with Aunt Virgie and Uncle Dave while Pearl and her husband Price took mom who was saddled with extreme hearing loss.

Now Pearl found that starting a life of motherhood with a teenager who not only had physical disabilities but was rather immature for her age as well as having emotional issues was far from an easy task for her to take on; quite often head butting between the two would be the norm. As Ma grew older Pearl did all she could to prepare her for the real world. On several occasions she would send her out to find work and made a way on her own, but each time it was more than Ma was able to adjust to; a long-distance phone call, a bus ride and the two would be back to together. As much as Pearly Mae wanted my mother to learn to stand on her own two feet there was no way on earth she was going to let her fall hard and not be there to pick her up. This continued for years, through my unexpected birth (which brought a whole new round of problems as you can imagine) and into my late teens when Pearl retired in Ohio and moved back to West Virginia. With the exception of me being there, this was really the first time Ma was completely on her own, at least so I thought.

It wasn’t until years later that I learned “Great!” Aunt Pearl was still part of our life, watching out for us. I doubt a week went by where they didn’t talk on the phone at least twice, and if a money issue came up, well you knew the check was in the mail. As when Ma was young, if she found herself in an unpleasant situation that proved more than she could handle emotionally, she’d go running home. Several times she traveled down to West Virginia and spent a week or more with Pearl till she could cope with life and return north. But even then, there were the spats, squabbles and disagreements that they could get in to. Hey, that’s what family does, right?!!

The night I received the call that there had been a car accident and my beloved Pearl was not expected to make it, two levels of fear gripped my very soul. The first, I wasn’t prepared to lose one of the greatest influences on my life; and the second, how was I going to tell Ma. Arriving at her place in Ohio, it was pretty much how I expected. “No! It’s bad but she’s going to be alright, she’s going to pull out of this, I know it!” We arrived at the hospital the next morning and sadly her prediction proved to be wrong; Pearl went home to be with Lord one hour after we got there. Ma’s whole world went into a tailspin; there was surprise, sadness, confusion. And so much anger. I came to realize in my mother’s thinking she just believed Pearl would always be there for her, to talk to and run to when she needed her. The thought that she was gone was more than ma could accept and bitterness began to set in deeply.

This pattern with Ma continued on for the several days during the time we were down home, until we finally went to Pearl’s house for the first time on this visit. At first, she was like a bull in china shop rushing from one room to another, upstairs and down, inside and out breathing hard with each step she took. I’m not even sure what she was looking at or for, perhaps she just had to see everything as it was the last day Pearl stepped out the front door, never to return. Then I saw it lying on a small table by the door. At first it looked insignificant, just a letter Pearly Mae hadn’t gotten around to mailing. Then I looked at the envelope, it was addressed to mom. Opening it I read the card inside before handing it over to her. The words “Many are the people who come along in life, but I’m thankful that God gave me a daughter (and under the word daughter she wrote niece) that’s as special as you are. Love you. Pearl.” There was a long moment where Ma stood there silent, not moving. I went over, held her tightly and could feel the tears as they ran down her face. I believe at that moment Ma came to the reality that Pearl was gone. And she also came to realize that no matter what she did, no matter how they fought and disagreed, Pearl loved her with all her heart.

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

Pearl and Ma could get downright aggravated and frustrated with each other, that’s for sure. But that didn’t mean they didn’t love each other. Possibly Ma may have doubted how Pearl felt about her at times, but with just a few little words she showed her love that was like God’s–never wavering, never ending.

Both these wonderful ladies who meant so much to this man have finished their “Travels of the Rock Road” and gone on to be with the Lord. I look forward to seeing them again someday. It might be hard to track them down, but if there’s any “loving sort of bickering” allowed to go on in Heaven, trust me! I’ll know those voices right away!!

See ya next time.

When I look back at all the problems Ma experienced both physically and emotionally, I realize my biggest concern was someday I would leave home and she would grow old all alone. I never knew my father and with the exception of the man she married for a short time when I was a child, there was no one to take care and love her. She dated several times but they never lasted, seems she always sent them packing with the warning to never come back. So as she grew older Cathy and I had to take care of her, and the thought would come as to what life might have been like had she had a spouse. Since God blessed me with my incredible Lady these past 40 plus years, the concept of being alone was strange and even frightening to this man. Frankly looking back at my life before Cathy makes me wonder if I would even be alive at this point if it was not for her being there as my helpmate. Then one day I remembered a conversation my beloved Great Aunt Pearl and I had several years after I had married.

A new man had come into my mother’s life that at first appearance it seemed she finally found someone perfect for her. But just like the others it wasn’t long before she sent him away like the others. Feeling frustrated about Ma’s losing streak with men, I asked Pearl what she thought the problem was.  She explained to me that it wasn’t just one problem but several. The first was the betrayal mom felt with my father when he never had anything more to do with her or me after he found out mom was pregnant. She truly loved him but was deeply hurt when she discovered his true colors.  Arlan, my short-term stepfather, came along when she was desperate to have a man in her life. Unfortunately, he turned out to be a hard core violent alcoholic, so he was gone. After that she used (what Pearl called) a man measuring stick and if they didn’t measure up to what she was looking for she didn’t want them around. There was a pause and a gaze as if Pearl was peering at something far off before continuing. She went on to tell me that there were certain traits a man had to possess to come in my mom’s life. He had to be hardworking able to support a family, he had to treat her with tenderness and true love, he had to be honest to her about everything in his life, but most of all, he had to love me the same way she did. If they couldn’t give her that then she didn’t want them around.

Romans 8:38-39 “For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

As Ma “Traveled the Rock Road” of life she discovered a love that was true, that was always there, and that would never leave or forsake her. And the more she gripped on to the love of God the more content with her situation she became. She used to say to me; “God has given me you, and a wonderful family of a daughter, grandchildren and great-grandchildren; I have been blessed to have so much love in my life.” October 30, 2008 my young, beautiful and vibrant mom found herself in the arms of her greatest true love, Jesus, and will never be alone again.

Proverbs 8:17 “I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently find me.”

Matthew 28:20b “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Psalm 136:1-3 “Praise the Lord! He is good. God’s love never fails Praise the God of all gods God’s love never fails Praise the Lord of lords. God’s love never fails.”

Now I realize there are many around the world who like Ma find themselves alone, and if it were possible I’d gather all of them together to love and protect for as long as I could. But God knew the frailties of man, our limitations, and our short stay on planet earth when we consider eternity. That’s why He’s there for us, when others fail to do so. He had a plan of Ma’s life; He has a plan for your life. The only question then is will you accept it?

As one writer put it, “No matter who you are or even what you’ve done, God loves you today, He loved you yesterday, He loves you tomorrow. He loves you Always.”

Just some thoughts from the Gray One,

See ya next time.

It had easily been 20 years since the last time T.J. had crossed paths, and it was good to see my old friend again. Like me he had spent a number of years trying to break into the mainstream music industry but with one exception. At the height of my talent I consider myself an above par musician; T.J. on the other hand was an extremely talented saxophone player that could have played any venue in the country. Coming from musical gifted parents they had hoped he would have studied to teach music or perhaps join an orchestra in one of many metropolitan cities like they had done. But T.J.’s sights were set on something more; if he couldn’t make it as a soloist he dreamed of becoming part of a headline act, recording records and touring the world. Unfortunately as with so many talented musicians, T.J.’s opportunity never came so he gave up the dream and settled into a regular job and lifestyle. But it was so good to see him again and now with a wife and two children. We exchanged pleasantries and talked a little about the old days; then I asked, “Do you still blow that horn? You were one of the best I’ve ever heard.” There was a sudden look of shock and fright on not only on his face but his wife’s as well, and the kids were looking up at T.J. as if to say dad what’s he talking about! Quickly gathering his composure he answered, “Oh I haven’t played that thing in years, it was just a passing fad I was going through.” A few more small comments and we parted ways with smiles and hugs; but as I watched them walk away it didn’t take rocket science to know I had hit a delicate nerve.

It was as few years later I was with another friend and told him about my encounter with T.J. and how strange he became when I mentioned his horn playing. “Oh, you don’t know the story do you?” my friend commented. When T.J. met his future wife he was still playing and that was okay with her. But when the kids came along she hoped that he would give up and be home more since traveling took him away for weeks at a time. T.J. wasn’t ready for that and he kept playing, hardly seeing his family. It was when she got a call one day from a gal who told her T.J. and her had been together a lot when he was gone playing that everything changed dramatically. His wife gave him a choice, his music or his family; he chose music. For nearly a year he stayed away from home and tried to convince others, and especially himself, that this was for the best. The lied he told himself never took hold and my friend became sadder and darker with each passing day. During this time he caught on with a band that landed a tour beginning in England and going across Europe and into Asia. What he had dreamed of most for his life now seemed like a nightmare because he just couldn’t get his family out of his mind. Early one morning he packed his car, left a note to tell the others he wouldn’t be going with them to Europe, then drove 18 hours to get back home. I’m told the reunion was a little shaky at first, but when his wife realized his sincere desire to be with her and the children there was a jubilee at that little home of major proportion!

Unpacking the car the first thing he did was take his saxophone and put it in the back of a closest there to stay; he was finished chasing the dream, for he nearly lost a better one in the process. His children were too small back then to remember or know daddy had been a musician. So when I brought up the subject (which is better known as open mouth, insert foot) it was the first they had ever heard of his talent. I’m told later he sat the kids down and told them about his band days, but also how it was the best decision he ever made to stop playing the part time role of musical star and take up the full-time role of husband and dad. I understand the kids thought it was great and were a little amazed old dad wasn’t as boring as they thought! (Now how many of us have heard that?!!)

I’ve read this verse many times, Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” I used to believe that if I had a plan in my heart and dedicated it to God, it would come to fruition. It wasn’t until I realized just because it was my plan didn’t necessitate it was God’s and thus I started to see the picture  more clearly. Toil, hardship and setbacks can all be a part, but as long as I look to my Lord I knew He was with me and had a better design than I did. Or as one put it; “God’s plan will always be greater and more beautiful than all your disappointments.”

This “Traveler of the Rock Road,” T.J. learned that his greatest happiness wasn’t found on the world stage, it was on the living room floor playing Monopoly with his family while sharing a large bowl of popcorn. He’s dug out his sax and has gone back to playing with the town orchestra and is featured at nearly every performance, with his wife and children sitting in the front row cheering him on.

Now that’s a superstar if I’ve ever seen one!

See ya next time.

It was a number of years ago when my Lady and I traveled down to Hollywood Florida, a quaint little beach community (at least it was then before the casinos came in) between Fort Lauderdale and Miami. We had come there for a week-long conference at a college we were interested in attending, plus it was a cheap vacation that came with room and board in the Sunshine State. The school located right on the beach was impressive and the speakers were all the good; but the biggest impression I left there with was that of the happiest man I would ever meet, the janitor.

Each mealtime all the other attendees would be herded with into a large cafeteria, and there at the doorway entrance would be Stan. “Hello! Hi! How are ya! Good to see you!” He would reach out to shake as many hands as he could and the ones he couldn’t he would point at them, maybe make a funny face or use a different voice, just to let them know he saw them. Cathy and I immediately fell in love with this whimsical character and looked forward to his happy greetings each day. Nearly everyone felt the same way we did, but there were a few that would have to make snide remarks of his overly pleasant ways and constant smile. One young man (who I hope has matured since then) remarked “What’s wrong with you, did you escape from the nuthouse or something? Why are you always happy?!!” Stan paused for just a second, but the smile never left his face. They he asked “Is it wrong to be happy? Should it be looked at as a disease?” The young man didn’t answer, shaking his head he continued into the cafeteria. Knowing my Lady who was close when this conversation came down wasn’t going to leave it like that; soon as she reached him she let him know how much we loved seeing him and hearing his greetings each mealtime. Others followed in suit and I could tell Stan appreciated it as he continued his continued calling, “Hello, Good to see you!”

I made friends with a senior there at the school and asked him if he knew anything about Stan the Janitor. “A lot!” he remarked. “Matter of fact he’s going to give his testimony in my dorm room tonight to about half a dozen guys I’ve invited to hear his story; we’d love to have you join us.” Since dorms were separated male and female Cathy couldn’t come, but I accepted my friend’s invitation; Stan’s constant smile and sunny disposition made me want to know more about him.

The dorm room was small with some sitting on the bed and the rest of us on the floor while Stan sat in straight back chairs, and he began. Born in Brooklyn in the 1910s he came into the world with a sever birth defect to his mouth, right arm and right legs. His parents were quick to reject him and thus he was sent to an orphanage; he would spend all of his youthful days there. As other children with more perfect bodies would be adopted Stan with his deformed body would constantly be looked over, he would spend all of his growing up years a ward of the state. During this time Stan had many surgeries to correct the problems most of which you wouldn’t notice today unless he pointed them out. When his time ended at the orphanages he was placed in a boarding house and sent to a trade school where he learned to work on boilers, furnaces and anything to do with heating. He admits merging into the world all alone didn’t leave him with the best attitude. He explains further that he would be hateful with people and preferred just to be left alone. None of this changed until he was sent to work to be an apprentice to an old journeyman in the trade who was exceptionally nice to him. If Stan was late, there was no lecture; if he made a mistake, only understanding and explanation on how to do it right next time. Many would be the invitations by the old man for Stan to come home to have dinner with he and his wife; each time he would refuse. Finally giving in, Stan accepted and showed up at the apartment of the old man where he was met by the wife who greeted him like a long lost relative she was so happy to see again. For the next four hours he laughed, smiled and felt more at ease than ever before in his life; for the first time Stan was experiencing what it felt like to be cared for.

For several years Stan was a regular visitor to their home; he would be there on holidays and they treated him like family. He’d go with the old man to a street mission and to the orphanage where Stan was raised and volunteer to fix things in need of repair. Once a month they would go to a church where the couple attended to do work. Always Stan was invited to attend with them on Sunday but refused.  He had come a long way in his negative attitude but still had a hard time believing a loving God would put him through all he experienced as a child. One day the old man shared with him something he never told him before. They once had a daughter they loved dearly but tragically died when she was hit by a car at the age of 10. “How could you not be angry with God when that happened?!!” Stan questioned. With a soft smile and a look in his eyes like he was seeing her once again he slowly answered, “I was for a while, but as time went on it was like God saying to me, go and love others like you did her, and like I do you. You’ll see her again and when you do I’ll be there too.”

“I believe that the happiest of all Christians and the truest of Christians are those who never dare to doubt God, but take His Word simply as it stands, and believe it, and ask no questions, just feeling assured that if God has said it, it will be so.” Charles Spurgeon

It was then Stan realized the old man didn’t practice a religion; he lived a faith that no matter what happened God was still with him to get through it and always looked upon him with love and a smile.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 – “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

Stan concluded his talk to us that night with, “If this man could love and be happy after what he went through, then I knew he had something real that I wanted like I never wanted anything else in the world. I set myself to the task that no matter what happened I would look on others the same way, the way Jesus did for each you.” Reaching in his shirt pocket he pulled out a small piece of well-worn cardboard; “When the old man went to be with the Lord he left me all his tools. In the top drawer of the tool chest I found this note he had written, ‘Never stop caring for others the way God cares for you.’”

That’s what brought him through life and when he retired to Florida he knew God wanted him to be at the school to continue sharing that love, that happiness, that smile. Of all the great speakers I heard that week at the conference, this precious “Traveler of the Rock Road,” Stan and his message to few young men in a small dorm room one late evening stays with me. I like that.

I usually have some last thoughts to share with you good folks, but I think I’ll leave it here. Perhaps after reading this you may be encouraged to go out and spread a little of God’s love to others — Stan style.

See ya next time.

Some thoughts on Easter from the pen of a fellow “Traveler of the Rock Road” Dr. Mark Soto

Yesterday and Tomorrow, Christians will celebrate what is the cornerstone of the gospel and the Christian faith….the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 15:3-8). Many will dress up and attend church (maybe for the only time this year) and we will recall a story as familiar to us as seeing a sunrise or sunset. But is that all this should be to us? A story repeated, sung about, and celebrated once a year?

At the heart of this is God in flesh! (Matthew 1) Jesus, who is fully God and fully man. Sin, the result of the fall (Genesis 3) affecting every aspect of the universe that God created and most significantly affecting mankind specifically me and you! Centuries of rebellious humans rejecting the Creator and His rule over the universe. The Romans, fulfilling the destiny of God when in Galatians 4:4 Paul said, “In the fullness of time!” And the necessary shedding of blood for the remission of sin and the redemption of mankind (Hebrews 9, and Galatians 4:5)

The horrifically graphic depictions in movies like the Passion of the Christ, try to capture the brutality of crucifixion but we are honestly too far removed from that time and culture to be able to fully understand just how horrible it was for our Savior. Add to that, if Romans 5:12 is true and death is the result of sin then because Jesus “knew no sin,” “did no sin,” and ultimately “became sin for us” death could not touch Him until sin was placed on Him! Thus when it is said of Him on the cross that He “bowed his head and gave up the spirit” in John 19 the word used for “gave up” means to hand over or deliver up. It is a verb that expresses the action of the subject (Jesus) and the fact that it was he that turned over His spirit (life force) willing it to leave and accomplishing the fullness of the effects of taking our sin on Himself….1st the spiritual separation from God the Father on the cross, and then his physical separation from His body in physical death.

I am profoundly amazed at this verb indicating that death was so foreign to his being because he was the God man that he had to will his spirit to leave even after fully absorbing the wrath of God for sin. Sin was not IN Him but was placed ON Him so that in His death our sin, my sin, would be paid in full! I cannot fully process how much love the Father has for us to send His Son into this world to pay the price for sin and to purchase not only my redemption but the redemption for all who would believe (1 Timothy 4:10).

Tomorrow, as we celebrate the resurrection, let us not just review the facts which are so familiar, but also consider the impact of what those facts mean to each of us who have exercised faith in that sacrifice…..eternal life now, and forever with Him, the one who died for us!! As the song says…”face to face with Christ, my Savior, face to face what will it be?” What will it be to see Jesus! I long to see His face, and experience His voice, and worship Him face-to-face……FOREVER!

Happy Resurrection Sunday!!! He Is Risen!!!