Traveling the Rock Road

It had easily been 20 years since the last time T.J. had crossed paths, and it was good to see my old friend again. Like me he had spent a number of years trying to break into the mainstream music industry but with one exception. At the height of my talent I consider myself an above par musician; T.J. on the other hand was an extremely talented saxophone player that could have played any venue in the country. Coming from musical gifted parents they had hoped he would have studied to teach music or perhaps join an orchestra in one of many metropolitan cities like they had done. But T.J.’s sights were set on something more; if he couldn’t make it as a soloist he dreamed of becoming part of a headline act, recording records and touring the world. Unfortunately as with so many talented musicians, T.J.’s opportunity never came so he gave up the dream and settled into a regular job and lifestyle. But it was so good to see him again and now with a wife and two children. We exchanged pleasantries and talked a little about the old days; then I asked, “Do you still blow that horn? You were one of the best I’ve ever heard.” There was a sudden look of shock and fright on not only on his face but his wife’s as well, and the kids were looking up at T.J. as if to say dad what’s he talking about! Quickly gathering his composure he answered, “Oh I haven’t played that thing in years, it was just a passing fad I was going through.” A few more small comments and we parted ways with smiles and hugs; but as I watched them walk away it didn’t take rocket science to know I had hit a delicate nerve.

It was as few years later I was with another friend and told him about my encounter with T.J. and how strange he became when I mentioned his horn playing. “Oh, you don’t know the story do you?” my friend commented. When T.J. met his future wife he was still playing and that was okay with her. But when the kids came along she hoped that he would give up and be home more since traveling took him away for weeks at a time. T.J. wasn’t ready for that and he kept playing, hardly seeing his family. It was when she got a call one day from a gal who told her T.J. and her had been together a lot when he was gone playing that everything changed dramatically. His wife gave him a choice, his music or his family; he chose music. For nearly a year he stayed away from home and tried to convince others, and especially himself, that this was for the best. The lied he told himself never took hold and my friend became sadder and darker with each passing day. During this time he caught on with a band that landed a tour beginning in England and going across Europe and into Asia. What he had dreamed of most for his life now seemed like a nightmare because he just couldn’t get his family out of his mind. Early one morning he packed his car, left a note to tell the others he wouldn’t be going with them to Europe, then drove 18 hours to get back home. I’m told the reunion was a little shaky at first, but when his wife realized his sincere desire to be with her and the children there was a jubilee at that little home of major proportion!

Unpacking the car the first thing he did was take his saxophone and put it in the back of a closest there to stay; he was finished chasing the dream, for he nearly lost a better one in the process. His children were too small back then to remember or know daddy had been a musician. So when I brought up the subject (which is better known as open mouth, insert foot) it was the first they had ever heard of his talent. I’m told later he sat the kids down and told them about his band days, but also how it was the best decision he ever made to stop playing the part time role of musical star and take up the full-time role of husband and dad. I understand the kids thought it was great and were a little amazed old dad wasn’t as boring as they thought! (Now how many of us have heard that?!!)

I’ve read this verse many times, Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” I used to believe that if I had a plan in my heart and dedicated it to God, it would come to fruition. It wasn’t until I realized just because it was my plan didn’t necessitate it was God’s and thus I started to see the picture  more clearly. Toil, hardship and setbacks can all be a part, but as long as I look to my Lord I knew He was with me and had a better design than I did. Or as one put it; “God’s plan will always be greater and more beautiful than all your disappointments.”

This “Traveler of the Rock Road,” T.J. learned that his greatest happiness wasn’t found on the world stage, it was on the living room floor playing Monopoly with his family while sharing a large bowl of popcorn. He’s dug out his sax and has gone back to playing with the town orchestra and is featured at nearly every performance, with his wife and children sitting in the front row cheering him on.

Now that’s a superstar if I’ve ever seen one!

See ya next time.

It was a number of years ago when my Lady and I traveled down to Hollywood Florida, a quaint little beach community (at least it was then before the casinos came in) between Fort Lauderdale and Miami. We had come there for a week-long conference at a college we were interested in attending, plus it was a cheap vacation that came with room and board in the Sunshine State. The school located right on the beach was impressive and the speakers were all the good; but the biggest impression I left there with was that of the happiest man I would ever meet, the janitor.

Each mealtime all the other attendees would be herded with into a large cafeteria, and there at the doorway entrance would be Stan. “Hello! Hi! How are ya! Good to see you!” He would reach out to shake as many hands as he could and the ones he couldn’t he would point at them, maybe make a funny face or use a different voice, just to let them know he saw them. Cathy and I immediately fell in love with this whimsical character and looked forward to his happy greetings each day. Nearly everyone felt the same way we did, but there were a few that would have to make snide remarks of his overly pleasant ways and constant smile. One young man (who I hope has matured since then) remarked “What’s wrong with you, did you escape from the nuthouse or something? Why are you always happy?!!” Stan paused for just a second, but the smile never left his face. They he asked “Is it wrong to be happy? Should it be looked at as a disease?” The young man didn’t answer, shaking his head he continued into the cafeteria. Knowing my Lady who was close when this conversation came down wasn’t going to leave it like that; soon as she reached him she let him know how much we loved seeing him and hearing his greetings each mealtime. Others followed in suit and I could tell Stan appreciated it as he continued his continued calling, “Hello, Good to see you!”

I made friends with a senior there at the school and asked him if he knew anything about Stan the Janitor. “A lot!” he remarked. “Matter of fact he’s going to give his testimony in my dorm room tonight to about half a dozen guys I’ve invited to hear his story; we’d love to have you join us.” Since dorms were separated male and female Cathy couldn’t come, but I accepted my friend’s invitation; Stan’s constant smile and sunny disposition made me want to know more about him.

The dorm room was small with some sitting on the bed and the rest of us on the floor while Stan sat in straight back chairs, and he began. Born in Brooklyn in the 1910s he came into the world with a sever birth defect to his mouth, right arm and right legs. His parents were quick to reject him and thus he was sent to an orphanage; he would spend all of his youthful days there. As other children with more perfect bodies would be adopted Stan with his deformed body would constantly be looked over, he would spend all of his growing up years a ward of the state. During this time Stan had many surgeries to correct the problems most of which you wouldn’t notice today unless he pointed them out. When his time ended at the orphanages he was placed in a boarding house and sent to a trade school where he learned to work on boilers, furnaces and anything to do with heating. He admits merging into the world all alone didn’t leave him with the best attitude. He explains further that he would be hateful with people and preferred just to be left alone. None of this changed until he was sent to work to be an apprentice to an old journeyman in the trade who was exceptionally nice to him. If Stan was late, there was no lecture; if he made a mistake, only understanding and explanation on how to do it right next time. Many would be the invitations by the old man for Stan to come home to have dinner with he and his wife; each time he would refuse. Finally giving in, Stan accepted and showed up at the apartment of the old man where he was met by the wife who greeted him like a long lost relative she was so happy to see again. For the next four hours he laughed, smiled and felt more at ease than ever before in his life; for the first time Stan was experiencing what it felt like to be cared for.

For several years Stan was a regular visitor to their home; he would be there on holidays and they treated him like family. He’d go with the old man to a street mission and to the orphanage where Stan was raised and volunteer to fix things in need of repair. Once a month they would go to a church where the couple attended to do work. Always Stan was invited to attend with them on Sunday but refused.  He had come a long way in his negative attitude but still had a hard time believing a loving God would put him through all he experienced as a child. One day the old man shared with him something he never told him before. They once had a daughter they loved dearly but tragically died when she was hit by a car at the age of 10. “How could you not be angry with God when that happened?!!” Stan questioned. With a soft smile and a look in his eyes like he was seeing her once again he slowly answered, “I was for a while, but as time went on it was like God saying to me, go and love others like you did her, and like I do you. You’ll see her again and when you do I’ll be there too.”

“I believe that the happiest of all Christians and the truest of Christians are those who never dare to doubt God, but take His Word simply as it stands, and believe it, and ask no questions, just feeling assured that if God has said it, it will be so.” Charles Spurgeon

It was then Stan realized the old man didn’t practice a religion; he lived a faith that no matter what happened God was still with him to get through it and always looked upon him with love and a smile.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 – “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

Stan concluded his talk to us that night with, “If this man could love and be happy after what he went through, then I knew he had something real that I wanted like I never wanted anything else in the world. I set myself to the task that no matter what happened I would look on others the same way, the way Jesus did for each you.” Reaching in his shirt pocket he pulled out a small piece of well-worn cardboard; “When the old man went to be with the Lord he left me all his tools. In the top drawer of the tool chest I found this note he had written, ‘Never stop caring for others the way God cares for you.’”

That’s what brought him through life and when he retired to Florida he knew God wanted him to be at the school to continue sharing that love, that happiness, that smile. Of all the great speakers I heard that week at the conference, this precious “Traveler of the Rock Road,” Stan and his message to few young men in a small dorm room one late evening stays with me. I like that.

I usually have some last thoughts to share with you good folks, but I think I’ll leave it here. Perhaps after reading this you may be encouraged to go out and spread a little of God’s love to others — Stan style.

See ya next time.

Some thoughts on Easter from the pen of a fellow “Traveler of the Rock Road” Dr. Mark Soto

Yesterday and Tomorrow, Christians will celebrate what is the cornerstone of the gospel and the Christian faith….the death, burial, and resurrection of Jesus Christ (1 Corinthians 15:3-8). Many will dress up and attend church (maybe for the only time this year) and we will recall a story as familiar to us as seeing a sunrise or sunset. But is that all this should be to us? A story repeated, sung about, and celebrated once a year?

At the heart of this is God in flesh! (Matthew 1) Jesus, who is fully God and fully man. Sin, the result of the fall (Genesis 3) affecting every aspect of the universe that God created and most significantly affecting mankind specifically me and you! Centuries of rebellious humans rejecting the Creator and His rule over the universe. The Romans, fulfilling the destiny of God when in Galatians 4:4 Paul said, “In the fullness of time!” And the necessary shedding of blood for the remission of sin and the redemption of mankind (Hebrews 9, and Galatians 4:5)

The horrifically graphic depictions in movies like the Passion of the Christ, try to capture the brutality of crucifixion but we are honestly too far removed from that time and culture to be able to fully understand just how horrible it was for our Savior. Add to that, if Romans 5:12 is true and death is the result of sin then because Jesus “knew no sin,” “did no sin,” and ultimately “became sin for us” death could not touch Him until sin was placed on Him! Thus when it is said of Him on the cross that He “bowed his head and gave up the spirit” in John 19 the word used for “gave up” means to hand over or deliver up. It is a verb that expresses the action of the subject (Jesus) and the fact that it was he that turned over His spirit (life force) willing it to leave and accomplishing the fullness of the effects of taking our sin on Himself….1st the spiritual separation from God the Father on the cross, and then his physical separation from His body in physical death.

I am profoundly amazed at this verb indicating that death was so foreign to his being because he was the God man that he had to will his spirit to leave even after fully absorbing the wrath of God for sin. Sin was not IN Him but was placed ON Him so that in His death our sin, my sin, would be paid in full! I cannot fully process how much love the Father has for us to send His Son into this world to pay the price for sin and to purchase not only my redemption but the redemption for all who would believe (1 Timothy 4:10).

Tomorrow, as we celebrate the resurrection, let us not just review the facts which are so familiar, but also consider the impact of what those facts mean to each of us who have exercised faith in that sacrifice…..eternal life now, and forever with Him, the one who died for us!! As the song says…”face to face with Christ, my Savior, face to face what will it be?” What will it be to see Jesus! I long to see His face, and experience His voice, and worship Him face-to-face……FOREVER!

Happy Resurrection Sunday!!! He Is Risen!!!

Personally, I believe one of the hardest things a child learns to cope with is that their norm is not the same as everyone else around them; in my case it was the lack of a father. Where other children around had a mom, dad and siblings, my family nucleus mom, myself and a great-aunt and great-uncle. Early on the thought of a father never crossed my mind; it wasn’t until I started school and kids would ask me where my dad was, and I really didn’t know. I had heard Ma (as I called her) tell different stories to others that contradicted each other; he had died, they were divorced, he lived somewhere else due to work. When we were alone and I asked her where dad was she would answer, “When you get old enough to understand, I’ll tell you.” That wasn’t much comfort and even added to my confusion, but I would wait and ask again and again and again. But always the same answer, “When you get old enough to understand, I’ll tell you. As I grew into my teen years this became a point of dissension between ma and I, and not only her but other people that I was close to would not give me the answer I so desperately desired; not even the person I trusted and revered more than anyone else in the world. “Johnny, I plan to tell you someday, but as long as your ma doesn’t want you to know, I can’t say a word.” So, the mystery continued and for a time I grew angry, dark spirited and withdrawn. If I didn’t have to talk about it, I wouldn’t have to answer any questions, nor put up with the ridicule and teasing from bully types. I did all I could to convince myself it wasn’t important anyway and it didn’t bother me. But it did, and deep inside, it was like a dull pain that wouldn’t go away.

By the time I was sixteen I was pretty much living on my own, playing music and showing up for school just enough to keep from being tossed out. During this period a police officer who I had some run ins with but saw that I wasn’t a bad kid, went out of his way to keep me out of trouble did me the biggest favor he could have ever imagined. After one of my stupid shenanigans that he bailed me out of, I had to meet once a week to give him a report on what I was doing. It was over coffee at a local dime store that I asked him one day, “You’ve known my family since we came here; do you know what ever happened to my dad?” It seemed forever he stared into his coffee cup before questioning on why I was asking him. After a half hour of giving my reasons and assuring him I’d never say who told me nor speak harshly to my mother on the subject, he began a story. A story of a young woman who was highly impressionable who also had physical, emotional and social limitations and the older man who took advantage of that. That is, until she became pregnant, he then left town and returned to his own wife and children. I suppose the normal reaction for many would have been anger, betrayal or sadness. For me it was like a hundred pound pack has fallen from my shoulders with the dark hole of my life now filled and it was okay.

It took a while before I approached mom to let her know my discovery, and that it was okay that I knew, and that I loved her just as much. But being careful and gentle telling her didn’t matter; she turned walked out of the room and refused to talk about it for many years.

A young unwed mother back in the early 50s carried a larger black mark than it does in today’s society. This stigma combined with other problems made the situation worse for my beloved mother and she would spend a great deal of her life hiding what happened. When the time came that we would talk, I learned more than I realized, not about my father, but about Ma. For me knowing the truth was liberating, but for her the shame cast in ignorance by some was like a cage; what I was franticly running toward, she was desperately running away from. When mom realized my love for her was untainted at the revelation of this deep kept secret, she too finally felt a release, a freeing of sorts of her soul that condemnation did not exist with me and especially no longer in her.

One of the most important lessons I’ve learn about my Lord is that He realizes first and foremost that we all have dealt with problems that taint our lives to some degree. That’s exactly why He let us know it’s okay, we’re not or capable of living perfect lives, totally impossible in a sinful world. That’s where His love takes over.

2 Corinthians 5:17 – “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”

1 John 1:9 – “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”

Romans 8:28 – “And we know that in ALL things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

The world will look and declare a mistake has happened. God says “You bring that to me and I’ll show you what I can make out of it, because of how much I love you.”

John Bunyan said, “No child of God sins to that degree as to make him incapable of forgiveness.”

I’ve shared this with you today not to tell a deep dark secret of my past as well as my mother’s. I’ve shared to let you know that hiding, covering over or denying past mistakes will never bring peace. My belief is that healing will only come when you release all that weighs you down to the God that’s able to forgive and start you anew.

Ephesians 1:7-8 – “In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that He lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding”

I like what Chuck Swindoll says, “When God is involved, anything can happen.  Be open. Stay that way. God has a beautiful way of bringing good vibrations out of broken chords.”

As mentioned before, it took mom a while to get used to me knowing the truth. But as time went on she was so glad to have someone to talk to about it, someone who understood, someone who saw her as the greatest mom he could have had in life.

When Ma’s days of “Traveling the Rock Road” were finished, she went from holding my hand, to the arms of her Savior.

“Hey Ma, where’s Dad?” Right where He should be, high and lifted up, seated on the Throne, and loving each and every one of His children, like only a Father could.

See ya next time.

It wasn’t long after my Lady and I married that we made the decision to move from Ohio and start afresh in Indiana. It wasn’t easy for a couple of 20 year- olds, not even married a full year, to pull up stakes from our home, families and friends and start our lives someplace where we didn’t know anyone or what to expect with me working part-time plus going to college and Cathy taking a job in a bank. Yes it was a bit rough but slowly we got adjusted to the new routine, the area and even made some new friends. The one thing that probably kept us going most was a promise we made to each other that as soon as I finished school we’d return to Ohio.

As the years unfolded it became apparent I wasn’t going to finish school, at least not where I first started and not in 4 years. But we had fallen in love with the little community of Warsaw/Winona Lake with all it had to offer and began making plans for a permanent home to raise our family. There was just so much it had to offer with the beauty of the lakes, churches to attend and many good jobs to choose from, plus a small-town atmosphere that is quite progressive with arts and entertainment. This was becoming home now and we were happy with our decision to stay. We felt we had everything we wanted and needed, but occasionally there was a missing piece that actually did weigh me down and I missed dearly. A quick phone and a 2 ½ hour drive through the night would soon alleviate that nagging dark feeling.

I had known Lynn since the 7^th grade and Don from about our sophomore year; as the years rolled on they became closer than just school years’ friends, brothers. We knew more about each other than others would begin to know. Cathy was my life mate and a day has not gone by that I haven’t thanked God for her being there for me, but occasionally a moment came when I had to just talk to someone else who knew me well. Now I had made many new friends, but it just wasn’t the same; we had no history where we had walked the same path together. So once in a while I’d make a call to one or the other around 9 or 10 in the evening, then set off in the direction of Fremont, Ohio or Grand Rapids, Michigan for an important engagement of sitting around a living room strumming guitars and singing old songs, maybe going down somewhere to catch a band performing, but often just sitting in a coffee shop laughing and talking about the old times and what life was handing us now. After several hours, it was back in the car and home just as day was breaking. In one aspect, it was exhausting driving so far for what most would see as nothing important. But to me it was new life pumped back in my soul, just spending a little time with ones who I knew, would always care and be there for me.

C.S. Lewis sums up friendship like this, “Friendship is the instrument by which God reveals to each the beauties of all the others.”

When you have a friendship where each one can take turns telling all that’s on their heart while the other does nothing more than listen, you have something special, something in this man’s thinking as a gift from God. That’s what bonds you, that’s what gives you that love for the one who has “Traveled the Rock Road” with you, and both were glad they were there for each other.

I see Jesus in the same light, as not only my Savior, but my friend; not because I say it, but because He does.

John 15:15 “I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.”

John 15:13 “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”

God has surely blessed me with wonderful friends; my Lady, Donnie, Lynn, and of course Christ himself.

Proverbs 18:14 “One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

We don’t see each other the way we used to; those all-night get-togethers are a few years back down the road. But I know at any time I can pick up the phone and our connection, our bond doesn’t start again, it merely picks up where we left off, just like when I pray to the Lord. That’s a love closer than a brother.

Who knows, now that we’re older perhaps we’ll all end up someday in the same nursing home, that is until they kick us out for getting all the other patients rockin out to little CCR and Steppenwolf.

“Get your motor running!!”

See ya next time.

I don’t know a time when my Lady and I had felt so heartsick, so desperate that this wasn’t really happening, and so betrayed.

For the first six years of our marriage we had no children. It’s wasn’t for not trying or not wanting especially Cathy, but it seemed like we’d never have our own family. We both saw medical professionals in hopes of finding out the problem and correcting it, but we both checked out perfectly. It began to weigh on us that perhaps God didn’t want us to have children, or possibly biological ones. So in our fourth year we began to explore adoption and every agency we could find that dealt in the process. For a time that proved to fruitless also, as many organizations were flooded with requests for children and the waiting list, if you even got on it, was years long. We finally came across a very large church (this was in the days before they were called mega-churches) who took our application and set up an appointment right away. During the interview we were asked many questions and then assigned a case worker to come to our home for an inspection and more interviews. The gentleman we met with that day let us know we’d be under a microscope for the next three months and if they chose not to place a child with us they would let us know early in the process.

We were a bit nervous on the first visit from the man assigned our case, but it seemed to go well. He asked questions on our growing up years and the families we came from, then our marriage, friends, occupations, education, church affiliation. He also asked about our outlooks on life and our relationship to God; all questions we answered honestly and what we felt positively. During five different visits, we were barraged with these and many more questions, and our responses were more at ease and we could tell the caseworker was feeling comfortable spending time with us. After the fifth he told us he’d be back in two weeks for the final meeting. Our hearts nearly jumped out of our chests. Others had told us if you get it to the last interview you’ve made it; we were going to have a baby!!

His words on that day still ring in my ears, and the feeling that came over us was terribly numbing beyond description. “I’m sorry, but your spiritual life is not where we feel comfortable in placing one of our babies with you; I wish you well.”

Darkness flooded us like a tidal wave that we were sure to drown in. It was difficult to comfort Cathy when I felt none myself. “God, I don’t understand! Why would you let this happen?! Are we truly not good enough to be trusted with children?!!”

Healing was long in coming, but it did. For me, whether the assessment was fair or not it made look hard at my spiritual life, my commitment to the one I called Lord. Had I turned everything over to Him? Truthfully the answer was no. One of my passages from that moment, and still today is “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” I didn’t understand what happened but I knew I had to trust in God no matter what the outcome, even it meant being childless. A saying I heard goes like this; “Those to learn to leave everything in God’s hand will eventually see God’s hand in everything.” So, I learned to give it over to my Lord, and I felt peace.

For my Lady, it was more about waiting on God’s timetable and not her own. Psalm 37:7a “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.” Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” And this is her verse for this 2017. Psalm 46:10 “Be still and know, I am God.” It was hard for Cathy, like me, and the peace was slow in coming. But the peace came; this is, until two years later when she woke up with an unusual “Morning Sickness!!” Six years into our marriage Jamie Melissa was born, 20 months later Jeremy David, and 20 months after that Justin Michael. Since those days with the additions of the kid’s spouses and grandchildren these two “Travelers of the Rock Road” who grew up as only children now have a family totalling 15.

To date there’s still that lingering question of the problem the adoption people had with us. I have my own ideas but there not worth going into. All I can say is perhaps God had to use them to wake us up to trusting and waiting completely on His will and timing?

Maybe, just maybe, He’s waiting on the same from you. Just a thought.

See ya next time.

When I was a child and we moved out of West Virginia to settle in Ohio, the home we found was on the lower east side of town near the river. It was a diverse group of people that lived there–black, white, Latin and a spattering of Germans that had immigrated to the U.S. There were a good many, that like us, had moved there from Appalachia in search of work. What I liked about it was there were lots of kids to play with whenever I ventured out into the neighborhood. My great-uncle and his temper were a deterrent to having friends over so I would head over to someone else’s house as often as possible. I particularly liked homes that had lots of kids; it was almost fascinating to see how a large group functioned in a small home with little if any chaos. So with that many youngsters around it was easy to get together a game of tag, baseball, football, snowball fights or whatever. Quite often yelling or fist fights would break out because someone didn’t play fair and the game would be over; but the next day, without adult intervention, professional counseling or a 12 step program, we’d all be back playing again. Looking back I can see it as one of the few places I felt comfortable–safe I suppose would be a better word. At school I got picked on a lot, but someone didn’t dare come into the neighborhood to start trouble with one of us; you might have a group from 4 to 14 jumping on your back! Yeah, it was a great place to be a kid; you could go down a block to the river to fish, get a baseball game up at this old field across from a trailer park, and in the summer there was a little park that everyone congregated at next to the old East-Side Fire Station. I think we felt we had it all when we were young, carefree and together. It helped shield us of the stigma that others had; that the lower east side was one of the poor sections of town.

Most of the homes were well kept but older, cheaper to rent or buy. Nearly all the parents worked factory jobs and whatever else they could find to support a family. Cars were older, clothes were hand-me-downs and I’m told that the school dropout rate was nearly twice that of any place else in the community. But as children we didn’t know or care about any of that, that is until we got older and moved into new groups of friends outside our circle. I guess you start to see things in a different light when you reach adolescence, you notice your surroundings more and that of others that you now associate with and you become more self-conscious. I would see some who left the neighborhood at the high-school, but they would hardly speak especially if they were with their new friends; I’m guessing they wanted nothing to do with association of that place and time. I was guilty of the same thing; when we moved out I hardly went over to the old haunts and seldom would I speak to anyone from there.

So what happened? Was I now too good for any of those memories? I realized later that yes, I and my situation had changed, but I was still who God made me.

I once read these words: “Let your past make you better, not bitter.” Perhaps if my mom could have afforded it, we would have lived in a better section of town, but she couldn’t, so her and my Aunt Pearl made the best home possible, just like everyone around us which is what added to our happiness. The cares of the world or what others thought was meaningless; we had love, our families and each other. For a while I forgot where I came from and treated people in a way that I never liked to be treated myself. But God reminded who I was and what I should do with this:

John 15:12 “This is my commandment, that you love one another as “I” have loved you.

This “Traveler of the Rock Road” that the Lord put in a place as a child to feel secure, to be happy, to have friends, to learn, love and live wouldn’t trade it to have lived in Beverly Hills!

I moved from my adopted home before I was 21 but go back to visit from time to time. On occasion I’ve driven over to the old neighborhood and walked around. It’s very run down now and I’m told never go over there at night, which is why my visits have been in the early mornings. But as I walk the streets, I listen to the sounds of the past. I hear children playing, fighting, and playing some more. I see my first hero, Bill, the big kid that lived next door. I see the other Bill down the street, my very first friend, and others like Russell, Victor, Danny, Eddie and Edgar. I can still envision the prettiest girls in town: Damaris, Dinah, Nadine, Marchelle and Maggie. This all brings a smile to my face in the early morn. Then I think of the people that live there now, all the kids and do they come out to play like we did; are they shielded from the coldness that the world can be like we were. I don’t know any of that, but I do know this; each and every one is a good person. Oh, not because I say so, but because I have a God that says it, that we’re all worth something.

Romans 5:8: “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

With that kind of love, no matter who you are, “If you’re good enough for God, you’re good enough for me!

See ya next time.

Many have heard me say that other than the birth of my children the 80s it was a decade I’d just as soon forget. We all, from time to time, fall on rough road that makes us wonder if we’re going to live through it. But this traumatic moment seemed to drag on and even get worse with each passing day; I never became suicidal but frankly I would have welcomed death had it come.

It all started with a real-estate venture I invested in with hopes of riches beyond what my family and I would ever need.  Unfortunately, that would soon prove to be the worst money pit I ever fell in; there was constantly more cash going out than coming in. The upkeep, mortgage payments and loss of revenue from renters not paying or moving out leaving an apartment in shambles was staggering. I was going all over the state borrowing money from every lending institution that would deal with me, just to keep everything afloat. The real crushing blow came when the IRS froze all my assets and placed heavy fines for not filing taxes properly, and then I was accused of embezzling funds by the partnership. Not exactly the way I dreamed my rise as real-estate mogul was going to be. Sheesh!!

Also during the 80s two other heartbreaks came home to roost. The first was the loss of my beloved Great Aunt Pearl in a car accident; the loss of this dear lady and mentor sent me into a depression that lasted some seven years. Finally, to top off the cake while traveling to Ohio for Christmas I slid through a stop on an icy road causing me collide with another vehicle; this nearly took the life of another wonderful lady in my life, Cathy my wife.

So as you can see if there was a way I could open up the earth, push all that in and cover it, I would. I didn’t understand why all this was happening, and for the first time in my life as a Christian I began to question, “God where are you when I need you the most?” It just didn’t make sense how He could let so much happen when all I wanted to do was serve Him. So was this then the end? In a word, Nope!

I heard these words recently and believe they can be credited to our pastor; “A bad beginning isn’t the end.” My world was falling apart, but it wasn’t the final chapter in the Gray One’s Legacy. Even though I felt like God had deserted me, a soft voice quietly was saying, “I’m still here.” It first came in prayer where I stopped complaining all the time and began thanking Him that I knew He still loved me. It came reading more of His Word;

Psalm 50:15 “and call on me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you will honor me.”

Philippians 4:19 “And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.”

Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

I had to make a decision, are these just words written on paper to make me feel good, or is this truth of God’s love? I praise Him that I chose the latter.

Then of course there were the folks God placed in our path that helped with encouragement and prayers; I shudder to think where I’d be today without their support.

Now I could go on to tell you why I think these things happened as they did, but that’s not really important to me anymore. What is central is that my love for the Lord became stronger, and so did I.

It wasn’t easy or quick but slowly we got through all the problems. I worked extra jobs to pay all that was owed, never giving a thought to filing bankruptcy. We lived on bare minimum where Cathy’s talents at stretching a dollar kept us in our home and food on the table. We drove the best jalopy $200 could buy; then when it broke down we’d take it to the junkyard and buy another. (Little side note here; the kids would often lay on the seats or the floor so no one would see them in dad’s junk-mobile). Perhaps the best that happened to me was realizing as much as I wanted Pearly Mae back I knew she wouldn’t want to be; she was now in Glory with her Lord!

It was slow, hard and long “Traveling the Rock Road” back in the 80s, but when we came out, it proved to be one of the best learning experiences on trusting God I could have ever experienced. “But God, let’s not have any repeats, okay?!!”

Let me leave you today with some verses I have reread constantly, to remind me of those words, “A bad beginning isn’t the end.” Perhaps you’ll find yourself hiding them in your heart as this man has.

Romans 5:1-5 “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, Hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

Where there’s “Hope,” there’s a new beginning. Awesome!!
See ya next time.

This last Saturday my Lady threw a birthday party for three of our grandchildren, only problem is their birthdays are months away. Still we had cake (okay cupcakes) candles, presents, a trip to the local arcade so they could play games, dinner at one of their favorite restaurants, and finally back home to watch a video. All this was done immersed in fun and laughter. So now that I’ve muddied the waters by saying we had a birthday party but it really wasn’t anyone’s birthday I’m sure there are ones saying “What in the world are you talking about Miller?!!” Truth is it really was a birthday celebration, but not the type where our bodies age each year. This was in honor of each child making a decision to trust Christ as their Savior, one of whom this proud grandpa was privileged to lead to the Lord. Thus, each year Cathy picks a date closest to all of their spiritual birthdays to have a party just like a regular birthday, with a couple of exceptions of course. Yes, we plan a fun day just like you would for any anniversary, but if that was all it is then I’m sure the true meaning of what and why we rejoice would soon be lost. As any of you regular readers know, we hold to the position that eternal life in Heaven comes from believing in Christ as Savior and confessing we have sins that only He can rid us of.

John 3:16 –  “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

1 John 1:9 – “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”

So we are so happy and proud that these children that we love more than life would make this decision at a young age. But what if we just left it there and nothing more was ever said about this wonderful decision each made; as the years pass, would they then see it as something amazing and important? Would they even remember the moment and the why behind it all? Being the kind and caring grandma my Lady is each year she plans this not only to celebrate but to remind them of what they did and how important it is to their lives. The festivities always begin with that reminder and how happy God is that they trusted Him. She tells them over again how much He loves them and the importance of loving Him back. The video always has a spiritual message to it; perhaps how a missionary gave up much if not everything to tell others about Jesus who might never hear. Or it might be about someone who went through tremendous adversity until they learned the joy of the Lord. And it’s a reminder that God’s love for them never ends, and that He can’t wait to see them in heaven.

Isaiah 54:10 “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed, says the Lord, who has compassion on you.”

So I imagine as long as there’s life in my Lady, this incredible “Traveler of the Rock Road” will continue the celebrations and the reminders for each of our grandchildren. We both realize the day will come when we won’t be there to spur them on to love and trust God for everything, especially when the hard times come. But I’m betting they’ll be alright; after all they’ve had Sunday School and church to teach them, a loving mother that also teaches and prays over them, and an Irish-Mexican Grandmother who will never let them forget how much they’re loved by us and by God.

As Dr. Michael Youssef puts it, “When our children see us clinging to the promises of God, they will grow up trusting in His goodness. If we fail as adults in praying for and praying with the next generation, then they will become spiritually unsure.”
I have a feeling that “Matilda” (as I call my Lady) has got this one covered.

Happy Spiritual Birthday Blaine, Hailey Jo and Madison!

See ya next time.

The other week I had my 8-year-old granddaughter in the car with me and we were discussing our family on such deep topics such as who has the best voice, who’s the smartest, who’s the most serious and so forth. That’s when she looked at me with a mischievous grin and said “But you’re the craziest Grandpa!” She shrilled with laughter when I gave her a little poke mostly from knowing she had just made a funny at my expense. Truthfully though she’s right, I’m the one who usually does or says silly things to bring a bit of levity into almost any situation. You see I don’t believe there’s any more beautiful sound as that of laughter, particularly children’s laughter and the joy that comes with it.  I’m sure that stems from my childhood and the man who had the biggest influence on me back then.

Mom and I lived with my great aunt and uncle and he was a very stern and sober individual. He believed and tried to drill into my head that foolishness was just that and was worthless in a man’s life, unless of course you were using it to make fun and ridicule another person, a practice he seemed to enjoy doing to me constantly and especially in front of others. There were times his hateful and sarcastic remarks were more than I could handle and I just wanted to run as far away as I could get from him and the laughter. So having a indoctrination like that to laughter, it comes as no surprise that as I grew older I put on a hard façade; my way to telling others “You make fun of me and we’re going to have a major problem. Oh, and by the way, it’s okay if I do it to you.”  Funny how that works, without realizing it you can become the person or the attitude that you detest the most.

It wasn’t until caring people took me aside to explain laughter, especially at yourself, isn’t a bad thing and it doesn’t have to mean someone is being hateful to you. Some of the best comedians on TV make themselves the brunt of every joke while at the same time being some of the most caring people you’d ever meet. After becoming a Christian I made an amazing discovery, laughter is an important emotion God has given us as well as part of who I am in Christ.

Luke 6:21 “Blessed are ye that hunger now: for ye shall be filled. Blessed are ye that weep now: for ye shall laugh.”

Psalm 126:2-3 “Then our mouths were filled with laughter and our tongues with joyful songs. Then the nations said, “The LORD has done spectacular things for them.” The LORD has done spectacular things for us. We are overjoyed.”

Job 8:21 “He will once again fill your mouth with laughter and your lips with shouts of joy.”

Proverbs 15:15 “For the despondent, every day brings trouble; for the happy heart, life is a continual feast.”

You see there was a time I thought that being a Christian meant not having fun, or laughing, or even being silly from time to time, when actually we’re called to be joyous and happy in Christ. That’s not to say life is always rosy as a believer, we all know that’s not the way it works. But Jesus wants us to look at the big picture and see no matter what, He’s there for us.  And when this run we call life is over there’s more joy than we can ever imagine waiting for us.

Psalm 37:4 “Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

So as Travelers of the Rock Road, learn to be joyful, laugh, even be a bit silly!

Two of my favorite Max Lucado quotes:

“Be a child again. Flirt. Giggle. Dip your cookies in your milk. Take a nap. Say you’re sorry if you hurt someone. Chase a butterfly. Be a child again.”

“I Choose Joy…I will invite my God to be the God of circumstance. I will refuse the temptation to be cynical. I will refuse to see people as anything less than human beings, created by God. I will refuse to see any problem as anything less than an opportunity to see God.”

So I gladly accept and wear proudly the title “Silliest of the Family.” If it can show even one person, the joy that comes in Christ, then it’s all worth it.

Besides, if you’re in Christ, aren’t you called “Peculiar People”?  That’s Titus 2:14. KJV 🙂

See ya next time.